A review by bumblemee
All the Young Men by Ruth Coker Burks

challenging emotional informative sad medium-paced

5.0

[I hope this review is readable, I'm writing it way past my bedtime, but had to write it down before I can go to sleep.]

This book will stay with me forever, I think. And with it the names and stories of many men it tells you about, as well as Ruth herself. 

I don't even know how to find the right words for this book. I'll start by saying that Ruth is a very impressive person. She just keeps going and going and going, she just does not stop, no matter the obstacles she's presented with. She's really good at reading people and finding out how to approach them - no matter if it's someone whose help she needs or people she wants to inform about safer sex practices when she knows they won't to listen if she doesn't do it right. Her resourcefulness had me stunned more than once.

As someone who wasn't alive during the events of this book, it feels like it's very good at transporting the reader to that time period. - I watched an interview with Ruth on YouTube and she said she thinks people are thankful that she's sort of a vessel for the stories of people that would've been forgotton without her. This is very true for me. I am thankful she let Kevin Carr O'Leary into her life/memories and write them down, because this was an important read for me and I think it is for others, too.

There's a lot of pain within these pages, it hurt a lot to read this book. The way Ruth and especially her guys (as she calls them) were treated was brutal. I know this was the reality then and it therefore didn't shock me, but that didn't take away any of the anger and rage it made me feel. Or any of the sadness. This book made me cry within the first 15 pages and a few times after that. - Because of the contens, of course, but also because the words that transported said contents.
The writing style feels just so appropriate, the voice is so clear. It has beautiful words, but it doesn't sugarcoat anything. Sometimes tragic things are delivered within a short sentence, somewhere among all the other sentences, which makes so much sense, because this new tragic thing was normality for Ruth, it happened all of the time. But this kind of writing does not take away any of the impact, instead adding to it in my opinion.
It isn't all sad though. There's also wholesome moments, drag shows and people with a lot of love for one another. Also, Ruth has a lot of wit and her voice can be very entertaining.

I liked how you get to know different individuals better and how all of them were treated with a lot of love. You get to know them through Ruth's eyes and can tell how special each of them was, which is why I said in the beginning of this review that some of the names will stay with me. 

All in all I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn something about these years of the epidemic in the USA and how it impacted the queer community. In my opinion this book is written with a lot of care. I must say though that it isn't an easy read, at least to me it really wasn't. I would recommend to read this when you're in a good headspace.

Oh, one last thing: This book centers on Ruth and her work and while it does deal with political issues, it doesn't go beyond Ruth's life and perspective. So if you want there to be a broader context and reflection on "the bigger picture", this isn't really the book for you as it stays very personal. 

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